Jeremiah Kegslurper on How to Change Your Life!

Who needs Doctor Phil when you’ve got Jeremiah Kegslurper…comin to ya’ll live from a studio in Gladstone Manitoba Canada. {Cut to a shot of the studio}
Grumblin and complainin, bellyachin and cryin over spilt milk! Are ya like a lotta people these days, tryin ta do too many things at once and gettin burned out?
Why not try pickin on just one thing at a time? Why not focus on the one thing ya do best…think about it, what is it? Is it…grumblin…complainin…bellyachin…cryin over spilt milk? Figure out yer best thing and focus yer time doin that!
I guarantee that livin focused like this is gonna change yer life and the lives of the people around ya!
Now…Some city slicker kinda psychologists are gonna try an tell ya ta be happy an thankful instead…but I say, where’s the fun in that? Ya start bein happy an thankful…Next thing ya know yer out on the front porch, pickin on a banjo an singin songs in the sunshine. How stupid is that gonna make ya look? What are tha neighbors gonna think if they see ya singin songs an enjoyin life? They’re gonna think yer crazy!
Friend, don’t ya wanna look normal instead?
Why don’t ya set that banjo aside and and start doin yer pickin on other things?
I’m not sayin yer supposed ta start pickin yer nose!
I’m not sayin ya should be pickin at that scab!
What ya should really be doin is pickin on other people!
Come on now, they need ya ta be there for’em…
Let me ask ya, how’s them other people gonna feel if ya leave’em alone? Lonely…that’s what…an when people start feelin lonely that’s when they’ll start grumblin, complainin…and bellyachin…doin too many things at once just like you used ta do…instead of bein healthy and just doin just one thing at once, grumblin about you… pickin on them! I***We’ll be back with more lifechanging teaching from Jeremiah Kegslurper after these messages…

More life changing advice!
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