Exciting Zoning Codes! (Find Your Place in Society!)

Welcome to our society! We’re glad to have you…here. In order to provide structure for our citizens we have divided the community into the following zones. Please follow these zoning codes when deciding where to live your life.
1. The Comfort Zone. Situated on a beautiful mountain top, this is an exclusive community of our highest class* of citizens. If you can pay the price to live here, the spectacular view of all those stupid people beneath you will be your reward. Call William Z. Lucifer to arrange a tour of all the beautiful residences available in exchange for your soul.
Pay a high price and get the high life today!
*Class determined by bank account size. Not behavior.
2. The Productive Zone. This is our much more down to earth zone. To be honest, it is a pretty rough* neighborhood. Still, a surprising number of our prominent citizens have come from here.The area might be worth ta look if you want a home with character. Call Helena Christianson for more details on the multitude of average looking properties available in this zone.
Simple properties for simple people!
*Rough as defined here simply means occasionally going without Starbucks. If this is an issue, why not consider a property in the Comfort Zone instead?
3. The Zoned Out Zone. A space reserved exclusively for our bottom feeders. Drug dealers and porn peddlers are known to infest this area. But who are we to judge? People are free* to do as they wish! Still, this area is really only an option for those who can no longer afford to live in our other zones. However, since the cost to live here is free*, you may find that it suits your budget. Word to the wise! Call Big Louie (find him in the comfort zone phone book) first if you plan to set up shop in this zone.
Be free*! Live free*! For free!*
*Initial cost is free. Additional levies against your mental, spiritual and physical well-being may be applied.
Thank you for your interest in our society. We wish you all the success in the world…as long as we get a piece of it.

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